So he tells her of Ellen DeLoria’s smile, and how it broke his heart. Ellen’s swollen belly, and how Herman broke her heart because of it. A troubled son without a father—a steady gossip topic for nineteen years.
I’m, um, with Pepper now.
What? But… No, I don’t understand what the hell you’re talkin’ about, what about our kid? This fucking kid!
I’m sorry I—… I just…
…You’re such a fucker Herman, I can’t believe it sometimes.
I know.
You know?
Yeah.
What about me? Hm? You think about me? And what about this kid, huh? What am I gonna tell my son—your fucking son—when he asks: ‘Where’s Daddy?’ What about it, Manny, tell me!
…
I… I just can’t do it by myself Manny, please. You just… You gotta stay with me, stay with us. Please, Manny, you gotta do it.
Just… tell him I’m dead.
Can’t you love us? I know you could, Manny, just try for him. I’m—…I’m too scared to do this, I really am. I’m just a kid, Manny, come on!
…
Fine. Fine! You know what? Why don’t you give Pepper a big kiss for me, eh Manny?
“I was too young—I… didn’t realize he’d be my son, not at the time. Pep was pregnant with Freddie too and…” He chokes on his hysteria, nearly suffocates from the panic of it all. Herman is thankful that Kate is no longer coddling him. She just stares at him blankly—unpitying and unjudging, for she must know that she is just as bad as he is.
Or maybe she isn’t.
“Butch is yours.” She states in monotone, unquestioning.
“He’s Ellen’s.” He seethes hotly, grinding the heels of his palms into his streaming eyes, raking fingers through his wild hair and scraping dull nails against his scalp. “Not mine, not if I didn’t love him.”
“You love her, though.”
“Yes.” He gasps, nodding frantically, ripping at his hair. “Sometimes I look at… at him and I see me and her in his eyes and his face and I just hate him so much. He is such a bad kid.”
“He’s hurt you stupid bastard, you fuck up. Butch is a prick because his father couldn’t give a shit about him and his mom with his hands full of proper, sober pussy.” She lashes out so suddenly, so forcefully that Herman chokes on a sob and splutters into silence. A bewildering emotion burns steady in her eyes, wild and dangerous, enough to make him flatten against the wall behind him. “You’re a fucking Grade-A cunt, you know that?”
“Stop it, Kate.” His voice cracks in misery, eyes watching her as she crawls out from under the haven of machinery to pull her jumpsuit up properly. Herman follows her, grabbing at her arm and yanking her back bodily by her shoulder. It hurts her, he can tell by her hiss and wince, but he can’t think, can’t breathe, can’t stop. “You don’t know what it was like for me to do that. I love Pepper, more than anything, and I love Freddie—,”
“And me, and Ellen, and you hate Butch. Got it.” She leers, staring at him unmoving for a moment before slapping him so hard that her nails leave welts along his cheek. Fresh tears burn at the wounds. “Gotta split, Manny. Left the oven on, left the fridge open, forgot to feed my cat—all that.”
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timeasmymeasure
Criminal 7c/?
Date: 2012-08-19 11:33 pm (UTC)I’m, um, with Pepper now.
What? But… No, I don’t understand what the hell you’re talkin’ about, what about our kid? This fucking kid!
I’m sorry I—… I just…
…You’re such a fucker Herman, I can’t believe it sometimes.
I know.
You know?
Yeah.
What about me? Hm? You think about me? And what about this kid, huh? What am I gonna tell my son—your fucking son—when he asks: ‘Where’s Daddy?’ What about it, Manny, tell me!
…
I… I just can’t do it by myself Manny, please. You just… You gotta stay with me, stay with us. Please, Manny, you gotta do it.
Just… tell him I’m dead.
Can’t you love us? I know you could, Manny, just try for him. I’m—…I’m too scared to do this, I really am. I’m just a kid, Manny, come on!
…
Fine. Fine! You know what? Why don’t you give Pepper a big kiss for me, eh Manny?
“I was too young—I… didn’t realize he’d be my son, not at the time. Pep was pregnant with Freddie too and…” He chokes on his hysteria, nearly suffocates from the panic of it all. Herman is thankful that Kate is no longer coddling him. She just stares at him blankly—unpitying and unjudging, for she must know that she is just as bad as he is.
Or maybe she isn’t.
“Butch is yours.” She states in monotone, unquestioning.
“He’s Ellen’s.” He seethes hotly, grinding the heels of his palms into his streaming eyes, raking fingers through his wild hair and scraping dull nails against his scalp. “Not mine, not if I didn’t love him.”
“You love her, though.”
“Yes.” He gasps, nodding frantically, ripping at his hair. “Sometimes I look at… at him and I see me and her in his eyes and his face and I just hate him so much. He is such a bad kid.”
“He’s hurt you stupid bastard, you fuck up. Butch is a prick because his father couldn’t give a shit about him and his mom with his hands full of proper, sober pussy.” She lashes out so suddenly, so forcefully that Herman chokes on a sob and splutters into silence. A bewildering emotion burns steady in her eyes, wild and dangerous, enough to make him flatten against the wall behind him. “You’re a fucking Grade-A cunt, you know that?”
“Stop it, Kate.” His voice cracks in misery, eyes watching her as she crawls out from under the haven of machinery to pull her jumpsuit up properly. Herman follows her, grabbing at her arm and yanking her back bodily by her shoulder. It hurts her, he can tell by her hiss and wince, but he can’t think, can’t breathe, can’t stop. “You don’t know what it was like for me to do that. I love Pepper, more than anything, and I love Freddie—,”
“And me, and Ellen, and you hate Butch. Got it.” She leers, staring at him unmoving for a moment before slapping him so hard that her nails leave welts along his cheek. Fresh tears burn at the wounds. “Gotta split, Manny. Left the oven on, left the fridge open, forgot to feed my cat—all that.”